Shinra Sucks
by MomiRanLover
Summary: A parody of Final Fantasy 7 but with mostly Touhou Project characters Join Sekibanki and her party as she fights against Shinra, as she enters shenanigans all around her


Chapter one: Explosions and flowers

There was a woman standing in a dark alley, she had long black hair with white streaks throughout it and not to mention a pink hair tie to keep it in a ponytail, she also wore a pink dress with a slit opening slightly above her knees and a red jacket layered over the pink dress, with a basket of flowers hanging off of her left arm, she opens her red eyes as green embers fly in front of her face, she then starts walking out of the ally as the green embers were flying toward Shinra Tower, the scenery then shifted to a speeding train, the train soon stopped at a station, but there where Shinra grunts with machine guns on the watch as the train came to a stop,

A lavender haired woman with twin tails and a yellow dress leapt off the train.

"BUTT ATTACK!" She screamed as she butt bombed a grunt to the floor..knocking him out in the process, satisfied with this she got off of him and ran into the next room, there was another woman with violet hair and violet eyes with a olive green vest with a zipper installed on it, making sure to always keep it zipped, along with the vest she had forest green pants and black fingerless gloves, with both of her hands carrying a Gatling gun, she hitted the other grunt with it also knocking him out, looking back she told her remaining comrades to hurry up, as we focus on our main protagonist of this story, who was a red headed woman wearing a first class SOLDIER uniform, also revealing a scar ringed around her neck, as the violet haired woman also running toward the next room, two grunts came out of the same room just to assault the red headed woman but she easily defeated them, she sigh "dumbasses", she walked out of the room and into the next where she was greeted by Yatsuhashi, Benben, and Raiko

"Welcome ex-SOLDIER, to our stupid club called AVALANCHE"

Yatsuhashi said with a smile

Benben hitted Yatsuhashi in the head "it's a organization, and we're not stupid! Btw what's a member of SOLDIER doing with us?"

Yatsuhashi rubbed her head " by the way we never heard your name"

"Oh yeah, we hired a gal to help us yet we never heard her name until now" Raiko snorted.

"The name is Sekibanki."

The violet haired girl exited from a different room from Sekibanki's right

"And my name is Shinmyoumaru,...Benben,Yatsuhashi, Raiko, what are doing? Open up the gate so we can head up the reactor!"

All three of the tsukumogami spoke in unison "no, and please stop shouting before more enemies hear us"

Shinmyoumaru wanted to punch someone so she turned around and swung a fist at Sekibanki's face .

Before the punch landed Sekibanki removed her head and tossed it in mid air, making Shinmyoumaru's punch unable to land.

Benben having a change of mind started typing in some codes, unlocking the gate, The Tsukumogami ran into the room in front of them.

Shinmyoumaru looks at Sekibanki

"Ex-SOLDIER right? Still don't tru-mkgjvfkob..."

Before Shinmyoumaru could finished her sentence, Sekibanki shoved a eel in her mouth, and ran ahead with Shinmyoumaru not far behind, pulling the eel out of her mouth and tossing it aside, "when did you had eel on you, "

"To tell the truth, I caught it two days ago before I entered Midgar, from the nearby ocean."

"And it was still alive when you shoved it in my mouth, how did yo-",

Sekibanki held up a bag of water "this is salt water from the very ocean"

"That's unsanitary.."

Sekibanki dumped out the water since the eel was no longer alive "was planning to cook it up for tonight's dinner but oh well" looking up ahead, the Organization began opening more gates

As they rode on a elevator, Shinmyoumaru opened her mouth to talk, Benben and Yatsuhashi saw this as a good opportunity, grabbed her arms and pinned her down as Raiko shoved mushrooms, edible mushrooms mind you, in her mouth, Sekibanki just stared.

Benben and Yatsuhashi released hold of Shinmyoumaru's arms as she got up..she spitted the mushrooms as she gave Benben, Yatsuhashi, and Raiko a mean look

They all just shrugged

The elevator stopped and other continued making their way to the reactor

Benben stayed behind when Sekibanki and Shinmyoumaru climbed down the latter, , as they walked up to the vault, Sekibanki started feeling dizzy as she heard a voice in head head "this isn't just a reactor! And btw you still owe me house slippers.."

Ignoring it Sekibank setted up the bomb that Shinmyoumaru gave her, buy they were attacked by a guard scorpion... always keeping it's tail raised up it kept shooting lasers at Shinmyoumaru.

"Why me?!"

"I think it's malfunctioning...or it's just stupid."

The guard scorpion then walked off the ledge, falling down the pit below.

"Sekibanki..I think you hurt it's feelings."

Only having ten minutes to escape

"meh" Sekibanki climbed back up the latter only to find that Benben had her leg stuck .

Sekibanki freed Benben's leg from it's iron prison

They followed her until they unlocked one more gate running out of it as fast as they could.

Benben bombed the debris out of the way and they were finally out of the reactor

The reactor exploded.

And the last member to enter Sector 8 was Raiko as she ran in circles with her butt on fire, but that highly amused the Tsukumo sisters, until Raiko was able to put the fire out

Shinmyoumaru dismissed the team, so they all went in different directions.

As Sekibanki was walking down Sector 8, she noticed a black haired woman being knocked down.

She quickly got up and walked in front of Sekibanki.

"Dear god, what was that?"

"Nothing, nothing at all"

The basket on the woman's arm caught Sekibanki's eye

"They don't have many flowers here.."

"I'm guessing you want to buy some?"

Sekibanki opened her wallet, the woman took twelve Gil from her and in return gave Sekibanki twelve flowers, then the woman walked off, never to be seen again...probably.

Sekibanki looked at the flowers she was given

"Okay, that was weird..."

The end of chapter one..


End file.
